My God My Everything

Remember in yesterday’s blog how I said that I wanted to be a woman with a trusting heart and how timely the message on fear was?  Well God was going to give me an opportunity to practice becoming that woman.   Each year I make sure that I get all my preventative doctor’s appointments scheduled and completed.  I compare my test results with the previous year and always hope that the cholesterol levels and weight are better than the year before.  This year when I went to my mammogram I was given the option to have it done in 3D.  If I opted for this I would have to pay…

I read a book called Bread of Angels by Tessa Afshar.  It was a fictional story based on Lydia from the Bible.  In Acts 16:14 (MSG) the bible describes her as follows, “On the Sabbath, we left the city and went down along the river where we had heard there was to be a prayer meeting. We took our place with the women who had gathered there and talked with them. One woman, Lydia, was from Thyatira and a dealer in expensive textiles, known to be a God-fearing woman. As she listened with intensity to what was being said, the Master gave her a trusting heart—and she believed!   Lydia is…

One morning as I sat in my living room I was looking out at all the new snow and I began to take in the moment.  The Christmas tree was all lit up, Brock’s tree was decorated with memories, stockings were hung by the fireplace, the scent of cinnamon from the scented pine cones filled the air and I was warm and comfortable drinking a cup of hot coffee.  It was just perfect and I felt right at home.   Then I realized that I had stood at that same window exactly one year before looking out feeling so displaced, so exhausted, so fearful and discouraged.  It felt like a…

Technology….it’s great when it works properly or the way I would like it to.  But when it doesn’t or when my limited knowledge of it doesn’t produce the right results, it can be very frustrating.  This process of learning how to blog has been quite an adventure.  My husband told me there’s a Youtube video for just about everything and I think he’s right.   When I first started one of the options was to try creating the blog myself with the programs I had researched or I could pay someone to do it for me.  The process was intimidating so the second option looked most appealing.  But that’s not…

Moving in, where do you begin?  The house had been swept clean and the remodeling had begun.  We were living in the house during the remodeling so there would continue to be a lot of sweeping and minimal things were moved in so we could live there.   One morning as I was reading through one of my favorite commentaries, “Through the Bible with J. Vernon McGee,” I was reminded that the most important thing to do before continuing was to invite Jesus into the home.  J Vernon McGee told about a sign he had read in a friend’s home that said, “Joy is the flag that is flown in…

Closing day had finally arrived after more delays than I want to remember.  Our signing time was scheduled for 2 pm and it was my last morning in our home.  Tracy had to work that morning and would meet me just in time to load up the final items and say goodbye.   At first I was frustrated at being left alone to finish up the cleaning, but the truth was I was worried that the closing would be delayed again and I was tired of riding the emotional roller coaster.   As I cleaned the house I thought of the family that would be moving in and how they had…

After touring many homes, being out bid on homes, searching for a rental, desperate for a home, we finally bought a home!  That was quite a process.  We would be scheduled to see homes and before we arrived they were sold.  The market had really picked up and the options were getting limited.  We looked into renting, but it cost more than buying a home to resale.   We had made a full price offer on a home and I was sure we would get it, but it didn’t happen.  I was very disappointed and began feeling desperate.  We had to be out of our home in less than a…

While packing I came across a letter I had written to Brock in 2008.  It mentioned all the times we spent in our rocking chair and how precious it was to me.  Then it mentioned letting go of something in order to move on.  Never forgetting – but moving forward in a healing way.  Oh how the tears flowed.   The house we bought was smaller than our current home and would require that we downsize the furniture and household items that we would bring with us.  The rocking chair would not be going with us.  I couldn’t give it to a thrift store because I was too attached.  I…

Throughout the whole process of deciding to move and actually moving, there were several changes or course corrections.  It started off as possibly building a new home, then went to buying an older home and remodeling, then renting and back to remodeling.  As a planner you can imagine how all this change really cramped my style.   Needless to say I had many moments of irritation and most of them were directed to Tracy because it was his idea to move in the first place.  Well not really, it was God’s idea and Tracy was a much more willing participant that I was.  As I mentioned in previous posts, God…

By nature I’m a planner.  My husband teases me that I pack for trips weeks before and he throws a few clothes in a suitcase the day of and is ready to go.  Sometimes I remind him of a camping trip he took with our oldest son Mitch while I was away on a business trip.  He said they were able to get everything in the truck with room to spare, but when I go with them everything including the kitchen sink is packed.  But then I asked, “How was your food and did you stay warm?”  On that particular trip the answers were, “not very good and no, we…