Imperfect Progress
With my mind firmly set to move and knowing without a doubt that it was God’s will, the process began. Fixing little details, preparing the home to be sold, showing the home to prospective buyers and downsizing.
We decided to buy an older home and remodel it rather than build a new one. I liked that idea better because it gave us more options with a lower house payment, opportunities to recreate living space and work together. But moving is simply challenging, even when it’s God’s will.
I believe that God orchestrates things all the time. Whether it’s a book I read, a bible study I begin or life events. They all seem to magically come together at the perfect moments and still amaze me when they do. As the moving process began I was reading books by Lysa Terkeurst. They seemed to fit each and every step along the way, almost like a road map. In one book she talked about imperfect progress. It’s messy but it is still progress.
The process of moving can really bring out the ugly in me. Worry, anger, yo-yo emotions and doubts all were present. Thankfully I had my Sunshine Prophesy to read again and again and again. Each time it would dispel all of those feelings. It reminded me that this was God’s will and He was already there; right in the midst of the chaos and in the future. He’s got this! Trust Him!
As we began to downsize and pack it was like a major de-junking project. Getting rid of things that were not necessary and lightening the load. It’s crazy how much you can acquire in 10 years. As this process continued it made me think of my spiritual life as well. How many unnecessary things I was storing, carrying around and allowing to weigh me down. It was time for a spiritual de-junking too.
Events that God orchestrates, especially those that require us to let go of our will, have a way of surfacing issues that we need to deal with. God was giving me plenty of opportunities to see where my will was over shadowing His. He was showing me that I had beautiful words of love for Him, but for others, the words were critical and judgmental.
There were many times that I felt sorry for myself with all the work needing to be done and having to do portions of it by myself. But He would show me that in those moments He had meant for me to have one on one time with Him. I was never alone, He was always with me and wanted to work through it… with me.
In those moments of self pity as I voiced my complaints to God, He would patiently listen and then let me have a glimpse at my heart. It wasn’t pretty. He would then show me how I could get rid of the old junk thoughts, clean out that space in my mind and heart and replace them with truth…remodeling.
I have heard it said that “you love Jesus as much as you love the person you like least in this world.” When I say that to myself in those moments of complaint, it has a way of instantly humbling me. It also simplifies the situation.
Regardless of how I feel at the moment, if I do it for God, it will correct my heart and get me back on track. That was one of the many life lessons I learned and was blessed to live out while preparing to move – then do it for God. I am God’s steward – all that I have is really His – then do it for God. If I can’t do something for someone with a right heart – then do it for God.
It’s a process and I know that it will be life long, but God is loving and patient with my imperfect progress.
My prayer
Micah 7:7 – But as for me, I will look to the Lord;
I will wait for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me
Father, Thank you that you care so much about me that you disciple me. You show me things that need improvement with a heart of gentleness and purpose. You replace wrong thoughts with truth and show me how to have a heart for you which in time will become a heart for people. Help me to do all that I do as if I’m doing it for you. Amen.
Where does my help come from?
Colossians 3:23
“Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord.”
Matthew 24: 40
“I will tell you the truth, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers of mine, you did for me.”